Family Matters Advice Column
Letter from Ama
Good day Lady Suella,
My name is Ama. I am originally from Kumasi but currently living in the Central Region.
My auntie was married to a man, and together they moved to a neighboring country where they lived for many years and built their properties. They occasionally returned to Ghana but always went back to continue their life abroad.
Three months ago, we sadly received news of her husband’s death. When we informed his family, they instructed that my auntie should return with the body alone, without any family member accompanying her.
Our family insisted on going with her. On arrival, the husband’s family directed where the body should be kept but refused to pay the hospital bills, though they collected the receipts.
During the funeral, almost everything was left for my auntie to handle, except for the casket, which her stepchildren provided. After the funeral, the husband’s family took over all his properties, sold them, and left my auntie with nothing.
I would like to know:
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Can my auntie sue them for what they did?
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Who was supposed to accompany her with the body?
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Why was the responsibility of the funeral left solely to her?
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Could there have been a hidden agenda regarding her marriage?
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Is it right to sell the deceased’s properties while his wife and family are alive?
Counting on your advice.
—Ama Bufie
Response
Dear Ama,
First, let me extend my deepest condolences to your family, especially your auntie. Losing a loved one is painful enough, but the situation you’ve described adds an extra layer of distress.
1. Can your auntie sue them?
She can only pursue legal action if there is documentary evidence linking her to the properties—such as joint ownership papers, receipts, or a will. If the late husband left a will, she can claim her rightful inheritance through it. However, inheritance laws vary by country, so legal advice in the country where they lived is crucial. Without documentation, her chances in court are limited.
2. Who was supposed to accompany her with the body?
Traditionally, in many African contexts, the extended family of the deceased claims responsibility for the body. However, this should have been done in collaboration with the widow’s family. It was not right to insist that she travel alone.
3. Why was the funeral left solely to her?
Ideally, funeral responsibilities should be shared between both families. Unfortunately, in some cases, the widow is left to bear the weight of the arrangements, which seems to have happened here.
4. Was there a hidden agenda?
It may not necessarily have been a pre-planned agenda, but often in times of death, true intentions surface. Inheritance disputes and property struggles sometimes bring out selfish behavior from family members.
5. Is it right to sell the deceased’s properties while his family is alive?
No. Ethically and culturally, the properties should have been preserved for the benefit of the widow and children. If any property needed to be sold, it should have been done with the widow’s full consent.
Final Advice
Since the funeral has already taken place and your auntie may not have written documents to prove ownership, a legal battle may not favor her. My advice is for her to focus on moving forward with her life rather than pursuing a case that could drain her emotionally and financially. Justice is not always immediate, but time and life have a way of balancing such wrongs.
Encourage your auntie to remain strong. Sometimes letting go is the first step toward peace.
Take care,
Lady Suella
You can send your questions or relationship issues to our relationship coach Lady Suella on: +233 503695656
